4 posts tagged “music”
If you've ever thought that a nice way of spending Christmas with the family would be gathering everyone together and taking turns playing that one Banjo Kazooie Christmas level on the N64 (and who hasn't?) then I've got some Christmas music to play while you're baking Metroid-shaped cookies.
Normally, I'm not a fan of Sleigh Ride, since it's one of those songs that gets played four or five times an hour on the Christmas music station. However, for some reason I can't get enough of this version, performed by the One-Ups. It reminds me of playing Animal Crossing on Christmas and finding the Jingle carpet, one of my fondest Christmas memories. That Jingle Carpet and I had a lot of good times.
However, if you'd prefer your video game Christmas music to sound a little more 1988, you may prefer this version of Let It Snow by BitShifter that sounds like it came directly out of Kickle Cubicle. Yes, that's right. I said Kickle Cubicle!
Have yourself a nerdy little Christmas!
Mighty Fairly's last CD was awesome, and a mainstay in our CD player for months, so I'm really excited about this song and the next CD.
Oh, and My America is an anagram for A Racy Mime.
Is this a season especially bereft with misheard lyrics? 'Tis! Everyone knows the words to Christmas carols, which is why it's so funny that no one knows any of the words to Christmas carols. Now I am, of course, totally immune to singing incorrect Christmas music, because I have sung in choirs, and Christmas music is about 60% of any good choir's repertoire. However, part of being in a choir is having the proof that you've been mis-singing music shoved down your golden throat. I came to realize that not only did I not know the right lyrics, I didn't even know the right wrong lyrics. That is to say, most people make the same mistakes in Christmas music, but by comparison, my mistakes are completely off.
For example:
Good King Wenceslas
My version: Goat King wets his pants. Look out on the feast of Stephen
The correct incorrect version: Good King Wensy's car backed out on a piece of Stephen
WWWIAF? Christmas music has been surprisingly neglectful of the incontinence of the Goat King, but honestly, I'm more intrigued about which piece of Stephen was smashed under Wensy's car. Where was the rest of him at the time? Who was this Stephen, who leaves body parts somewhere that a king, a good king, can run over them? Was it the start of an international incident? Frankly, that's just the makings of a better Christmas song. Winner: Them.
Frosty the Snowman
My version: Frosty the Snowman is a fairly tainted sleigh
The correct incorrect version: Frosty the Snowman is a ferret elf I say
WWWIAF? Both versions try to cram a little more Christmas into a song that mentions neither Jesus nor Santa. In my mind, this kindly animated snow sculpture is also a means of winter transportation. The common misconception is that ol' Frosty is moonlighting as a ferret that is also an elf. Does this ferret make toys? Work for Keebler? Have exceptionally pointy ears? I don't get it. A fairly tainted sleigh makes ton more sense. Winner: Me.
Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire
My version: They know that Santa's on his way. He's loaded lots of poisoned goodies on his sleigh
The correct incorrect version: None. No one else gets this part wrong.
WWWIAF? Those poor tiny tots have no idea what they're getting themselves into. Not only will they leave the MRI all aglow, but they'll find it hard to sleep after a stocking-full of poison. Why did I think Santa was so malevolent? Probably because he never gave me Castle Grayskull. Anyone who could deny me He-Man's favorite hangout spot is probably someone who'd poison a kid. Clearly, I have problems. Winner: Them.
God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen
My version: God dressed you, Mary Jentermann, let's not think you're this made
The correct incorrect version: Get dressed ye merry gentlemen, get huffing you this May
WWWIAF? Clearly, I was jealous of Mary Jentermann's sense of style and couldn't bring myself to admit that she could achieve such fashions without some kind of supernatural help. She was simply years ahead of her time, and the flowing golden robes seemed like something she would have gotten from the Man Upstairs. The common version of this song is a little more urgent. If there are several undressed gentlemen running around who don't plan to shove off for five months, I'd think that would bring more tidings of annoyance and/or terror than comfort and joy. But what do I know? Clearly not song lyrics. Winner: Them.
Conclusion: I know most of these songs now, so I can console myself about this loss. I won't let it get to me, and tonight I'll sleep in heavenly peas.
Audio: What's your favorite carol or holiday song?
I need to find or create a Christmas CD that has the following tracks:
1. God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen/We Three Kings by the Barenaked Ladies and Sarah McLaughlin
2. Sweet Was the Song by the Concordia Choir
3. O Holy Night by some baritone who's not too warbly
4. Jingle Bells by Bing Crosby and the Andrews Sisters
5. Carol of the Bells by the Trans-Siberian Orchestra
6. Haitian Noel by, um Haiti, I guess
7. O Christmas Tree by Vince Guirardi
8. Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer by the Vagabonds
9. Frosty the Snowman by the guys who sing it on that one album my parents had that I would listen to as late as March.
10. O Little Town of Bethlehem by anyone who sings O Little Town of Bethlehem anymore
11. Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire by Nat King Cole and maybe also Natalie Cole
12. Silent Night by the Concordia Choir
13. Auld Lang Syne, karaoke version
14. I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas by, say, Britney Spears
And maybe some others, as long as they do not include Sleigh Ride, Winter Wonderland, and Jingle Bell Rock, because if I wanted to hear those songs over and over again until Christmas was naught but a black hole in my shriveled heart, all I would have to do is turn on the Christmas music station and in fifteen minutes, I will have heard them all, plus about as many puns on the word "yule" that any mortal man is able to withstand in one lifetime.
